Finding Your Crone's Time Away
A writing exercise for July, Under the Buck Moon
To mark July and the Buck Moon, we’re sharing an excerpt from our book, Rebel Wisdom: Creative Writing and Rituals for Women at Midlife. “Crone’s Time Away” is an invitation to step outside the demands of ordinary life and make room for rest, adventure, and a little delicious freedom.
For us, the high desert of New Mexico is a place of deep renewal. We plan soaking trips, setting aside whole days for rest and restoration. We spend our time in robes and bathing suits, moving between mineral pools of different temperatures, sipping prickly pear lemonade, sharing tostadas with guacamole. We soak first thing in the morning, steam rising as the sun clears the mesa, and again late into the night, easing into the hot springs beneath wide, star-filled skies. At dusk, we toast with a glass of dry New Mexico sparkling wine. Piñon wood smoke lingers in the air. Water murmurs around us. The landscape feels close and alive.
This ritual is our own form of Crone’s Time Away, a deliberate stepping out of ordinary life to listen more deeply. Crone’s Time Away is a reclamation, an intentional withdrawal that brings us back to ourselves. Do you find midlife to be the first time you can listen to your desires clearly? The decades before are often spent tending to careers, families, and expectations, with little space for solitude and reflection. Just as the moon moves through its dark phase, we also need seasons of retreat.
The Art of Withdrawing
Crone’s Time Away takes different forms. Some may seek an extended retreat, while others might find renewal in a single day of stillness. As Sarah Faith Gottesdiener tells us in her Many Moons planner:
There are often reasons for separation and solitude. To learn what your inner voice sounds like. To have time to develop your authentic self and craft. To protect you from harm. To help you learn the voice of the Goddess. To figure out how the Universe communicates directly to you. To discern what is for you and for you alone. The key is to set an intention: What do you need? What are you longing for? What needs to be heard?
You don’t have to travel far to take Crone’s Time Away. Cartoonist and writer Lynda Barry keeps a monthly Day of Doing Nothing. She stays in bed with beer and magazines, setting productivity aside and letting the day unfold on its own terms. What looks indulgent from the outside becomes subversively radical. Unstructured time creates room for ideas to surface, for insight to arrive, for something new to take shape. When the pressure to produce falls away, things come into focus.
What would a day of retreat look like for you?
Solitude as a Ritual
“Space is the ability to spread and expand. This expansion is essential for women. We are expansive and must allow ourselves time and space for the digestion of food, experience, and emotion,” says Kate O’Donnell in Everyday Ayurveda for Women’s Health. For some, time away means immersion in nature–walking in the forest, following the tides, or sleeping under the stars.
The natural world has its own wisdom, reminding us that cycles of withdrawal and return are necessary for growth. In Uncommon Ground, William Cronon challenges the idea that nature is something separate from us. He suggests that our relationship to the natural world isn’t just about escaping to wild spaces but recognizing that we are part of it. Spending time in nature becomes a ritual of reconnection–to the world, and to ourselves.
Others may crave a cultural retreat–time spent exploring art, music, or traditions that awaken creativity. My childhood friend Tanya traveled solo to Florence, Italy, to celebrate her fiftieth, immersing herself in Pontormo frescoes and taking in the beauty of a city steeped in history. Our senses heighten when we step into the unfamiliar–tasting new flavors, hearing other dialects, seeing the world with fresh perspective. Whether it’s a solo trip abroad or an Artist Date in your own city, immersing yourself in something beyond the everyday can be powerful and restorative.
One of the most radical aspects of Crone’s Time Away is asserting the right to be alone. Do you feel hesitation or guilt when you imagine claiming that space for yourself? Let those around you know: I’m not leaving you; I’m coming back to myself.
Even a few uninterrupted hours in a designated space, whether a room, a garden, or a rented cabin, can open the door to renewal.
Designing Your Own Retreat
Taking Crone’s Time Away doesn’t have to be complicated. What matters is the intention behind it. Here are a few ways to create your own retreat:
The solo soak – Visit a hot spring, bathhouse, or even your own bathtub. ‘Taking the waters’ is one of the oldest forms of healing.
The nature pilgrimage – Spend time walking in the woods, by the ocean, or in the mountains. Let the landscape guide your reflections.
The cultural escape – Travel to a new place or immerse yourself in the arts. Attend a concert, wander a museum, or explore a historic site alone.
The day of doing nothing – Take inspiration from Lynda Barry, pour yourself a brew, and spend an entire day in bed or on the couch, paging through magazines, doodling in your journal, or listening to the radio.
The sacred space at home – Create a space in your home that is just for you. A corner with a comfortable chair, pillows, a candle and a journal can become a peaceful retreat.
Channel Your Rebel Wisdom
Where in my life do I feel the strongest pull to step away right now, and what part of me is asking for space or solitude? If I claimed a week, or even a single day, just for myself, how would I choose to spend that time? Close by finishing this sentence: Crone’s Time Away, for me, is an act of _________.
We hope you make a little room this July to step away and claim some Crone’s Time Away of your own.
Taking the waters,
Aimée & Tenaya