Rituals and Recommendations for Retreating
Tips for taking time away during a turning point, at midlife or anytime
In our book, Rebel Wisdom, July’s writing exercises are all about setting aside time for regeneration — from exploring the art of withdrawing, to designing a creative pilgrimage. We shared a few of our own experiences with retreats and solo journeys — from setting off on a Chöd Retreat, to joining the Peace Corps, to inventing a radical sabbatical at midlife. As we wrote this book, we realized that travel often gave us direction during periods of indecision.
So for the end of this hot, heavy month (we’re under the Buck Moon, it’s intense), we offer you some tips for exploring your next path. Whether you’re in need of a mental siesta or a major shift, consider a retreat.
“We can choose to move like water rather than be molded like clay.”
— Terry Tempest Williams, When Women Were Birds
Terry Tempest Williams says it beautifully: we can choose to flow and find our own ways, instead of following worn paths created by social pressures and expectations. In the weeks ahead, why not explore:
A solo retreat?
A creative journey?
Below, we offer you ideas, plus our very own retreat kits!
To explore: Our Retreat Recs
Aimée: I’m always looking for places a little off the beaten path, especially islands where natural wine, wild landscapes, and thermal springs come together. I’ve followed chef Linda Sarris, The Cheeky Chef, for years and love her Sicily travel guide. Originally from Pennsylvania, Linda is now based in Palermo and leads culinary adventures throughout Sicily. I’ve been trying to set aside time for her Vino Volcanico trip to Pantelleria forever, and I am committed to joining the October 2027 trip. This women-only adventure takes place during harvest season on the “black pearl of the Mediterranean,” with natural wines, vineyards in volcanic soil, wild herbs, capers, local seafood, and dips in natural hot springs. We will sleep in dammusi, stone houses with a view of the sea, explore the island, and share communal dinners. Come to Pantelleria in October 2027 if you are ready for some island time.
Tenaya: My first writing retreat was at a Franciscan retreat center in Wisconsin, where a group of very cool nuns created a contemplative space in the woods. I rented a rustic hermitage without plumbing (it was what I could afford) and bartered for some of my stay by washing dishes. It was a life-changing experience to find such stillness, to live for a week in a small house with nothing more than a bed, a desk, and a wood stove. I ended up returning many times in my 20s and early 30s. It’s where I learned to meditate, cook vegetarian chili, and write a novel. I still think of The Christine Center as the place where I found the greatest pleasure as a writer. I went to the woods, and it forced me to write. To rest, first of all. Then to relax my mind. Then to write at all times of day, according to my own rhythm.
For anyone looking for deep quiet, seek out a Franciscan retreat center in the woods!
To pack: A Retreat Kit
Aimée: For a retreat or solo journey, I always pack:
my Celestron 8x42 TrailSeeker ED binoculars: During Covid, like many women at midlife, I turned my eye to neighborhood birding. After a little research, I chose these as a steady, lightweight, all-around pair. I’m a truly casual birder, but carrying binoculars is a surefire way to make friends and strike up conversations on the trail. I saw my first painted bunting this year!
Jae Bird Botanicals’ High Altitude Formula, with native osha root: For our trips to northern New Mexico, I always pack Jae Bird. The body needs a couple of days to adjust to the higher altitude, so that means lots of water, no alcohol, and Jae Bird.
my traveler’s notebook, it’s a whole journaling system. You can add individual booklets for different trips, seasons, or projects; some of mine date back years. Together, they have become a portable archive of my travels, ideas, and earlier selves.
Tenaya: For a retreat or solo journey, I always pack:
a bottle of lavender - I like to dash a few drops on my wrists before I write and add it to my pillow at night. (Aimée turned me on to the desert lavender of New Mexico, which has a warm, earthy aroma I love)
poetry (at the moment, I’ve been enjoying the poems of Margaret Atwood)
sage tea and a bottle of whiskey
To relax: Creative Mood Waves
Aimée: I’ve been listening to Space Echo: The Mystery Behind the Cosmic Sound of Cabo Verde. Its cosmic Moogs and highly danceable West African rhythms just put me in the best mood. Even its origin story is magical: a missing ship loaded with synthesizers was found stranded off São Nicolau, and the instruments found their way into the islands’ schools. Now, after Cabo Verde’s history-making World Cup debut, the music feels more joyful than ever.
Tenaya: When you’re writing or journaling, it can be helpful to choose music you wouldn’t listen to at any other time. That’s how I discovered Cello Drones, recordings of long, low notes that cellists can use to tune their instruments. Give a Google, and you’ll find loads of cello drone links, but I’m partial to the list (link above) curated by The Wong Janice, a cellist and composer of ambient cello solos.
A question for our fellow rebels:
In our July chapter, we write about life-changing trips.
So this month, we’re asking:
What would a life-altering journey look like for you?
Care to share? We’d love to hear from you. Our community is small. Your secret will be well-kept here.